Some Notes On Slacking (Or Suspending Disbelief While Maintaining One's Balance)

Couture:
Dress appropriately. There are three acceptable options:
1. wear black (it flatters and flattens the figure, and gives you a certain and elegant gravitas)
2. wear colours that complement the particular slack-line you're walking on (yellow and black if you're on the Gibbon Jibline, green or red when walking the Heinz Zak Mountain Equipment Chill line)
3. wear camouflage (so you're not spotted).

Etiquette:
1. maintain a sombre disposition (especially when slacking in the local cemetery)
2. when confronted by officials - be they council workers or park-rangers - emphasise your middle-class credentials (extensive vocabulary and clearly-articulated vowels). That way, the intellectual and spiritual element of your pursuit will be recognised, revered and condoned. (One way to ensure community goodwill is to pretend that you're training in aid of some charity event - one that supports those less able and balanced than you)
3. if slacking with another, don't hog the line (remember, the better you get the longer it takes for you to fall off). Set an egg-timer for ten minutes and remove yourself from the line immediately once the alarm rings.

Concentration:
1. Never look at the line; find a focal point that is equivalent to your eye-level and fix an unwavering gaze on it
2. When people approach you, twist 180 degrees on the balls of your feet, and turn your back on them
3. Clear your mind of all that distracts you; a mantra can be useful. Quite often, though, you'll find yourself bouncing to a tune. My current favourite is 'Like A Rolling Stone'.

FAQ:
1. 'Are you training for the Olympics?'
2. 'Are you planning to run away with the circus?'
3. 'What do you think you're doing?'

Things To Anticipate (and ignore):
1. People staring (and occasionally clapping)
2. People making strange, loud noises such as 'boo'
3. People pestering you to let them have a go
4. People asking 'what do you think you're doing?'